Paris Is Still Paris: The Proof in Pictures (of Weird English Shop Signs)

No, I Assure You, Paris Is Not...

July 26, 2017By David JaggardC'est Ironique!

As a follow-up to my previous article, in which a fake-news-but-still-somehow-illegally-leaked (go figure) e-mail from Donald Trump indicates that he is “walking back,” as they say in Washington, his statement that “Paris is no longer Paris,” I address this open letter to Mr. Trump, his friend Jim, and all the citizens of the United States and the world:

friends,

I assure you that Paris is still Paris. Oh yes! Or, as we say here:

All over town, not just in…

but everywhere in the entire city, you still get the…

that you’re in a wonderful place. The architecture is still beautiful, the food is still great, the cultural scene is still lively, and the natives still have that unique Parisian style, flair and elegance. And even:

Spotted by reader Katie Anders.

Step out on the streets of Paris at just about any time of night or day and you’re bound to see a…

strolling arm in arm with an…

Spotted by reader Jake Dear.

After all, nothing is as important to Parisians…

Spotted by reader Ron Hurwitz.

All you have to do is…

to any gallery or museum in the city, and you’re sure to…

–tastic things. That’s because Parisians still have plenty of savoir-faire and savoir-vivre, and even…

Whatever the hell that means. In any case, they have it.

And for those who are wondering about the mood in Paris, I can assure you that there are no…

Spotted by reader PK Munroe.

Even a Parisian who is addicted to tobacco can claim to be a…

Also spotted by Jake Dear.

because everyone is so upbeat and optimistic.

And, as this missive illustrates, the shops, restaurants and other businesses in Paris continue to feel at…

to use, and misuse, English in their signage, always eager to…

–diocre trade name ideas to ridiculous lengths, without ever thinking…

Spotted by reader Jim Hutchinson (in Antibes) (which is still Antibes).

In conclusion, we can all look forward to more marvelous times, and more marvels of butchered English, in Paris.

Like Paris itself, Paris Update is taking August off. The next new C’est Ironique will appear on September 13. Readers who can’t go that long without more bad English shop signs can check out the previous 22 installments of this recurring feature starting here. And send me their own photos of ill-advised English signage in care of contact@paris-update.com.

David Jaggard will be performing standup comedy on Saturday July 29th, 9:30 to 11:00 pm at “WTF Paris,” SoGymnase Comedy Club, 38 boulevard Bonne Nouvelle 75010 Paris

An album of David Jaggard’s comic compositions is now available for streaming on Spotify and Apple Music, for purchase (whole or track by track) on iTunes and Amazon, and on every other music downloading service in the known universe, under the title “Totally Unrelated.”

Note to readers: David Jaggard’s e-book Quorum of One: Satire 1998-2011 is available from Amazon as well as iTunes, iBookstore, Nook, Reader Store, Kobo, Copia and many other distributors.

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